on relationships 1

Muscular and tall, the blue gaze of his eyes looked down. He was a lot of things I wasn't. Perhaps sad, but for a second of looking at me I wanted to live forever in that sort of beauty, however artificial or constructed. I could feel his nipples on my finger tips, his biceps around me, his pelvis against mine, his face against mine.

“I’m sorry what did you say?” It was a half ass smile. I mumbled something again. Ah whatever. He looked then blankly. I gathered a bit more strength. Stupid people all around. Stupid busy shopping day on a stupid busy street.

“I said I could fucking ride you all night long.” Of course, I really didn’t say that the first time.

“Really?” he said? He looked bored.

“Yeah.” I said. Then walked off, my short dark frame easily vanishing in the crowd. Then I came back. He was gone.
---

That night I was riding someone else. He was shorter with brown eyes and whatever he was doing, it was right. Still, I found myself thinking of someone taller and blue eyes. I then thought about me in the hills running amongst the oak trees then running off nearby the stone cliffs. I was thinking about how I was going to handle the late fees I was going to accrue from missing a couple credit card payments. It was that time of the month.

His dick was nice and hard, not unlike a past lover of mine who had quickly dumped me after the chance of a crush of his from years ago came back in the picture. He and this guy both had nice dicks. For a second, I was fucking both of them. Double fucking, which I could never do in real life… A nice long second, until I started seeing only my past lover’s face, no more double fucking, and my asshole started to close up. pain. His lips down on mine while his hard dick kept going in and out, and I was sincerely crying.

“you ok?” he said.

It’s not you, it’s me.

“Yeah, I’m cool. Harder.” I smirked and took a deep breath. Another deep breath. And another.

I held his neck with both my hands as he picked up intensity, and I started thinking about the holidays:

Before the gays had no family, as our families abandoned us, or we abandoned them. Now it seems like all the younger gays are close to their families. Maybe it’s because with the break down of the family here in the states, there was a shared recognition in all our families of how we are all diliquent. Maybe.

Another thought:
This guy is so hot.

Eventually I came with his dick in me. I was jacking myself off, naturally, but still amazed how much better it is when a dick is still in you.

Pachelbel canon was playing in the background. He decided to pursue one last kiss in fury of something akin to romantic, and there was sort of post climax after the climax with a climax in music.

I didn’t know what to make of it but it was nice.